Thursday, January 19, 2023

20th Century Russian and Hungarian Chamber Music at the Philharmonic

It's been another tough day, although there were a few nice calls with colleagues, and the weather is also quite chilly again.

In the evening I went with Ge. to the store and we split up: he bought the proper food, and I bought three round containers of ice cream to share with the family (not eat all by myself!).

Last evening the family attended a concert (thanks to T.'s generosity) at the Philharmonie building in Berlin's city centre. The Großer Saal (Great Hall) was hosting a concert at the same time, and a large stream of people was walking toward it and crowding the foyer, while the Kammermusiksaal (Chamber Music Hall) was more modestly busy. It was something we were doing in honour of Papa's would-have-been-70th birthday.

The programme: Sergei Prokofiev, Dmitry Shostakovich, and Béla Bartók. Scene: Geometrically patterned parquet of the stage, blue lighting, shadows of the chairs and the musicians projected abstractly onto the floor. White swathes of seating, as always. Spotlights, microphones, and what look like curling caterpillars hanging from the ceiling, as always. Lower rings of seats full, upper one partly empty. Four musicians in black suits and black pointy dress shoes polished so brightly that they glittered in the lights; music stands with scores for the viola and cello players, tablets for the first and second violinists.

Both Uncle Pu and I felt that Prokofiev's quartet suggested the countryside (for me, muddy fields, sagging wooden fences, a plodding beast of burden and a wagon and a farmer driving them). Shostakovich, he felt was revealed as the far superior composer, with more sophistication and artistic freedom. Bartók came after the intermission.

I agreed that it might make sense for the music to be edgier, too, and I was missing the raw emotion. Although raw emotion is not often the point of chamber music and besides the cellist was already adding roughness and friction from time to time. I was wondering if for example Mendelssohn's music might suit their style? T. or Uncle Pu argued that maybe it's for the best that we live in times where we can play music more mildly, without the grimness of the generation that lived through dictatorships and World War II.

In the family's professional's view, the 1st violinist did experiment with lots of musical ideas; but his violin was not quite the right one that would help them come across.

To go on to broader matters of audience enjoyment and world political context:

The appreciative audience rewarded the quartet with much clapping and whistling.

As the musicians came out from the mysterious room backstage after the curtain call and sat down for the encore, the second violinist told us (in German with an English quotation) that, as they travel, the quartet is often asked 1. 'Are y'all a band?' and 2. 'Where do you come from?' — The answer to #2 is Ukraine and Belarus. He acknowledged the ongoing war. (I can't tell apart Polish, Ukrainian, and other languages, but at any rate one/some of those languages was/were being spoken as we were later walking out of the hall onto Hans Scharoun's M. C. Escher-esque flights of carpeted stairs, so maybe there were Ukrainians and Belarusians in the audience too.) — The encore: a chamber music arrangement of a Melody by Ukrainian composer Myroslav Skoryk.

Saturday, January 14, 2023

Reflections in mid-January

It's true I was still lazy about my historical experiment this Saturday, and besides have given up exploring the 18th century on Sundays until the 1900-present experiment is over. For the 18th century, more equipment is needed, like properly period-appropriate lanterns, dishes, ...

But I ate cornflakes for breakfast as well as the traditional croissant and coffee. (Which was admittedly less effort than last weekend, where I emulated the fashionable 1990s 'continental breakfast' with boiled eggs and a glass of fresh orange juice accompanying the croissants and coffee.)

The rest of the day was taken up by errands. First, buying more donations for a Ukraine-centric charity as well as one for refugees in general. The drugstore was packed and it took longer than expected. So I absorbed details of fellow shoppers and the aisles, the Veganuary display with tinned jackfruit and other specialties, and leftover Christmas and New Year's stock. Cosmetics gift kits of course can't be stored for November 2023 without expiring.

On the way home, I went by the neighbourhood news kiosk/lottery ticket shop/parcel delivery station, which also had a longer queue than most days. The New York Times international edition hadn't sold out, and there were cookies and chocolate bars to add to the donations bag.

At Tempelhofer Airport, the donations place had not yet opened. But a stream of people, mostly younger than I, was walking along the sunken driveway to more distant hangars. A metal bin was sitting outside the door to receive donations; the fenced enclosure in the parking lot above the driveway had disappeared.

Optimistically, I'd hoped to buy new patches for the family's bicycle tires, as Ge. had kindly sacrificed his last one when helping me restore my front tire, which had been deflated by a glass shard. But the bicycle shop is only open Mondays to Fridays.

The next stop would have been a Greek supermarket, near the spot where Albert Einstein's apartment building used to stand. But either the supermarket moved away or I just didn't see it. It still feels like a creepy neighbourhood with its pompous/funereal imperial era architecture, interspersed with one or two buildings with 1920s/1930sesque grey tuff façades, and the signs with texts about all the Nazi laws that had made life hell for the Jewish community who used to live there. So though I think it's been reclaimed by democratic, diverse modernity, I was glad to cycle off again.

It began raining lightly, I was feeling a bit tired and weepy after another intense work week, and so I decided to go straight home instead of dropping by the dry cleaner's.

***

Altogether I haven't really felt the same since I got Covid. Perhaps more of the blame, however, can be laid at the door of the work layoffs and ongoing departures (another colleague sent around a goodbye email this week). I am applying a few anti-depression techniques like reducing sugar intake and doing more medium-intensity exercise; and hoping that singing in the choir will help.

In the meantime it's harder to wake up in the mornings; I forget to water the plants, which was not a problem before the layoffs; it takes self-discipline to open YouTube to do exercise videos; hobbies are languishing; I've gained weight; and I feel bad about myself. Once or twice I've reflected that the happiest parts of my life are over.

Gradually I've also realized an underlying problem. Since my tough time at school, I've generally been a lonely person, not tending much contact to friends or family because I was convinced that they'd start disliking me once they found out I was defective.

Finally, though, finding self-confidence and friendships at work in my early thirties had made me eager to keep and rekindle relationships.

But the relatives I'd been keeping at a distance have been dying off one by one, before Covid settled down enough and my travel anxiety receded enough so that I could visit them. The friends are being ejected from the company, and the ones who remain are often so unhappy that it hurts me to see it. I'm probably also feeling 'layoff survivor's guilt,' which makes it hard for me to write to departed colleagues without feeling like I'm a face of the company that laid them off.

At the same time I still have plenty of lovely people in my life, not all of whom are feeling miserable ...  and I feel that I am not disadvantaged. It is just that I am not as happy as I would like.

Wednesday, January 11, 2023

Vivaldi-Casals, 1929

I was researching a story I'm writing set during World War I. While trying to see which records soldiers would have been listening to, I came across this beautiful recording of a Vivaldi piece played by Pablo Casals.


(Musicology note: Although it's too late for WWI anyway, I looked it up: the major re-discovery of Antonio Vivaldi came later in the 20th century. But according to Wikipedia, a Fritz Kreisler piece in the style of Vivaldi set a mini-trend earlier, which is when Casals recorded this.)

Wednesday, January 04, 2023

New Year's Eve in Berlin 2022...

My records after I woke up on New Year's Eve — when someone detonated what sounded like a shopping cart's worth of firecrackers and fireworks in short succession, long after the hour where in previous years things would have quieted already.

Police were also 'on edge' because there'd been e.g. massive fights with people throwing firecrackers at each other in the past week. Even ambulances and firefighters were reportedly attacked in Berlin.

I'm having trouble writing real blog posts because I feel a bit too glum, but maybe this is also all right?

***

3:18 to 3:19 a.m. IIIII IIIII IIIII IIIII IIII
A bang every 2.5 seconds

3:22 a.m. Little curly white dog being taken out for a walk is barking
2nd Police van is gone
At least 4 or 5 onlookers holding up their smartphones and filming the firecrackers

3:31 a.m.
8 young women and men (men mostly standing around their parked car) looking northward

3:32 a.m. Emergency vehicle siren in distance
2 compact police cars (grey and blue) roll slowly out of the A***str. and turn right onto the B***str.

Before 3:39 a.m.

  • fire truck - U-turn on B***str. switching to northbound
  • police van up B***str. northbound
    • Lights flashing + siren
  • incredibly loud firecracker
  • ambulance - lights flashing
  • compact police car
  • loud bang of firecracker again

3:39 a.m.
compact police car, siren, lights flashing
bus M48 -> Mohrenstraße
compact police car (siren, lights) x 2
all northbound

3:43 a.m.
- there are still flashing blue lights reflected in Litfaßsäule of emergency vehicles stationed down the street

Ambulance without lights or siren
6 compact police cars head southward lights flashing

4:08 a.m.
Loud bang of firecracker, very close

4:09 a.m.
2 compact police cars at A***st./B***str. intersection, 1 of whom drove up with sirens & lights flashing, 1 police van

4:43 a.m.
trying to go to sleep again