Freelancing, Greek Snacking, and May Sunshine

It's been a while, but there's not that much to tell...

I've met with seven former colleagues since leaving the company, and it's been nice. At the same time there is still an 'echoing' quality in my day-to-day life now: I'm still more used to being more sociable, and at the workplace was probably in contact with fifteen or so people per week.

When talking with people and going to events for my freelance reporting, it's still kind of lonely (which is apparently why some professional journalists prefer being employed in a newsroom). It really is unlikely I'll ever see them again. But of course I like going out and understanding the world I live in better, and altogether the freelancing feels like what I was born to do.

I did an interview for a part-time job in tech support, which I did amazingly badly at. While I haven't gotten a final rejection yet, it's probably time for me to move on to the next application.

Volunteering is what I'm doing to feel like I'm working alongside everyone else — sometimes I did get the feeling that freelance journalism is more fun than I ought to be having, and only in the past week has it begun to feel like a real full-time employment of it own. That said, the supply of donations for Ukraine has temporarily dried up, so when I last went to the former Tempelhof Airport hangar, I was told that no help with sorting donations was needed at present. I could call a telephone number to check in whenever I liked.

As for the Greek class, it's nicer even that I'd hoped, and the amount of progress I'm making is amazing. Showing up for class regularly, and having made a little effort over the years to keep up the language, are paying off. And now that I know more Greek people in Berlin and have gone shopping at a Greek grocery store etc., I can really see myself applying the language.

At the Greek grocery store, the last time I bought halva, tahini with lemon flavouring (as addictive as Nutella, to me), sesame candy sticks, oregano potato chips, and more banana jello mix.

But I'm also starting a routine of shopping at a zero-waste store once per week. While I'm really enjoying cooking for myself again and trying new delicacies and just enjoying life in general, buying so much food in packaging seems unsustainable. Besides the store is nice and I want to support it.

As for the financial realities of freelance journalism, the impression is gradually sinking in that the market in Berlin is saturated. It feels difficult to publish anything. While the press seems to be supported infinitely better here than in North America, and it's also a luxury as a consumer to have the good assortment we do, I think it's also a dwindling market. So I guess I was just naive and overoptimistic.

In real terms, I need to accept that I may end up not publishing anything outside of my own website unless I begin to write marketing copy. It's not that bad and I'm hoping a part-time job will help me keep going without professionally publishing anything; but if I produce something truly excellent when freelancing, it would be nice to be confident that a professional editor will also see it and acknowledge it.

Full Steam Ahead in Greek and Amateur Journalism

It's been as busy a time as ever.

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On May 1st I went cycling off to make photographs of a peaceful morning demonstration by some of Germany's largest trade unions, metalworkers, music teachers, chimney sweeps, and rail workers amongst them.

I was a little in hokey awe of the open and pluralistic nature of the event. For example the Mayor of Berlin (whose policy and demeanour I'm generally not in favour of, otherwise) also walked in amongst the tents of a Volksfest in front of City Hall (where the procession ended) without revving up an armoured tank and wearing a cavalry helmet to do so. Maybe I'm too easily impressed by this point.

And while we were processing around Berlin-Mitte, I looked up at the crane at the top of a high-rise building, which workers use to clean the windows. And by a train of thought association, I was impressed at what union workers and manual workers do to keep the city and the country running.

I interviewed two men who have been in legal limbo for years after seeking asylum in Germany.

In the evening, I didn't cover the bigger Revolutionary Demo. It ended in organizational chaos when it was stopped early. But the police and the city government were pleased by how quiet it had been this year.

Instead of trying to write an article, I just posted photos with detailed explanations.

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I haven't finalized my article about Austrian literature. But there's a draft and now mainly I need to work on an illustration.

As for the fashion industry article, I need to research it more and to find a hook that's more compelling than 'this is activism that happened 1 week ago.'

Besides I need to be vigilant around conflicts of interest when I write about fast fashion: certain industry actors who are, for example, refusing to sign onto safety legislation in Bangladesh, are ones whose customer requests I helped fulfill in my previous job.

That said, I visited an art exhibition on the workers of Rana Plaza and their families, today, and took photos. So one further step is complete.

I think I was fooling myself a lot about the role I was playing in the fashion industry in the past job — although, to be clear, I'm not judging anyone else or saying they need to have the same threshold. It felt morally superior, compared to the average mass of consumers, to intellectually see and understand the waste in the industry.

But it's not just an environmental question. Looking at photographs of the dead bodies of workers who have been killed while protesting their working conditions, manufacturing clothes that maybe I helped sell online, really hits you like a brick.

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If it's not too fetishizing, I was thinking while walking around Kreuzberg today that I'd like to do a series of photographs about workers. (To be clear: just with my smartphone; I don't use an analogue or hybrid camera yet while I'm practicing.) There's something soothing about watching people put cobblestones back into place on a damaged sidewalk, or a plasterer at work in the hallway to an inner courtyard, or someone kneeling quietly beside the stream of passersby to redo the paint on a low garden wall.

It was also a beautiful day in general. Lush green grass lighted up by the sun from behind, mystical white globes of seeding dandelions, shy little bluebell flowers, lilacs just bursting into blossom, thoughtful white rhododendrons hiding in the shade, unbelievably hued Moulin-Rouge-red roses, and sleepy-looking horse chestnut flowers about to 'wake up' with another day of May sunshine.

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Yesterday evening, I was tired and wanted to stay at home. But instead I went to a glossy events venue in East Berlin to watch a question-and-answer session with Barack Obama.

He's been fundraising for his foundation by holding mass events in three European cities, although the Berlin press has generally been emphasizing heavily that it doesn't know that this is where the money is actually going.

I found the event quite depressing.

As a reader of news and as someone who'll be affected by world events, it was depressing generally. But it was also depressing personally.

Hopefully I don't seem self-aggrandizing by drawing any parallel, but the former President's mood about American and world politics at the macrocosm level reminded me a lot about my mood about the company that I used to work at.

He was as pessimistic and exhausted as I've ever seen and heard him, he looked ten years older than he is (but maybe mainly because he was tired of travelling), and he seemed to be trying to deal with no longer being able to influence things that he'd find it important to influence while things are heading to hell in a handbasket. The motto 'Change Over' that was broadcast before he stepped onto the stage might have been a clue of what would follow.

But I don't blame him for not painting things in rosy colours! The world doesn't resemble a François Boucher canvas.

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As for my Greek (guest auditing) studies, I'm making faster strides than I expected. A month ago, I could barely string together 5 words. Now I can write and speak entire paragraphs. The professor and fellow students are consistently lovely.

But I'm still not optimistic about being able to handle courses that are taught only in Greek in November, without a major additional effort, like travelling to Greece or getting private tutoring. (Tutoring which I'd want to share with the fellow students, who I think are anxiety-inducingly overoptimistic about how easy it is for someone who's been learning modern Greek for 1 year to make the jump).